Hi! I’m Nicky. (she/her/they), a queer, cisgender, full spectrum doula, living in Oakland, CA
I've been steeped in care work since the womb. My parents before retiring were a husband/wife, family doctor/nurse and social worker team who practiced family medicine in a small town in Canada for 41 years. From beginning around the age of three I would tag along for hospital rounds and make house calls with my Dad who figured out that what many of his patients really needed and benefitted from was social connection and the presence of a young, keen, attentive listener that was little me.
I was raised in the village model of care by my parents, grandparents who lived close by, and friends of my parents who behaved like family members - second Moms and chosen Aunts - who raised their own kids alongside my three brothers and I, joining for family dinners and holidays. My Mom does the well baby/new parent care for my Dad's practice and I grew up from before I could crawl hearing tips and tricks for feeding your baby, and how to support new parents. She would write permission slips for new parents to stay home in bed instead of travel for holidays and sign it Nurse Jill. She would include her phone number, offering to speak to any family member who was giving the freshly postpartum person a hard time about setting the boundaries they needed to care for themselves and their newborns. Her motto was if the person who gave birth is doing well - the baby will do well, so let's ask how we can support new parents and care for them so they can care for their babies. She advocated for Grandparents to give space for new parents to step into the role of parent and find their way with love and gentle support. My Grandma Betty was a labor-and-delivery nurse before getting married and my delight in, and reverence for babies, birth, and new parents comes from her. The first babies I cared for are now entering their second and fourth years of University! As a 16 year old nanny of a 3 month old, I used to attend new parent playgroups with her and was complimented on my attentiveness and ability to connect and care for her. Both my Grandmas, Betty and Frida, were incredible cooks, and I get my passion for cooking really good food, and delight in feeding people from both of them. Family dinners were always an important part of my life and I love the opportunity to create space for my clients to share in them with their own family. Oftentimes the recipes I cook for clients during their postpartum time become repeated family favourites for years to come. I have a BA in Global Studies and Anthropology and studied at the Masters level in Anthropology before taking time off to care for my Grandpa Bruce during the last years of his life before he passed away from Cancer. Caring for him reconnected me to my innate caretaking abilities, and I felt a sense of purpose supporting him to navigate the system of the hospital, and find the joy and delight that was possible in his last days. I felt wholly changed by the experience of being his companion through his last big journey in life, and I left academia and transitioned into doula work at the urging of friends who were already practicing doulas and recognized my intuitive knack for this work. In my spare time I love hiking in the East Bay Hills with my rescue pup Noah, cooking for friends, bumping into past and current clients at the Grand Lake farmer’s market on Saturday mornings, and swimming in the Bay with the Selkies, a group for queer and trans open water swimmers.
postpartum focused ~ full spectrum doula
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postpartum focused ~ full spectrum doula ⋒
My meals are nutrient dense, warming, delicious, and specifically tailored to the healing needs of postpartum people.
I share an extensive recipe document with clients with a wide range of meals and snacks. I also delight in cooking a family’s favorite recipes. Having many years of nanny experience, I know how to make an appetizing plate of food for toddlers, and to modify meals so everyone has something they are excited to eat. Many of my past clients have had dietary restrictions and preferences including gluten and/or dairy free, vegetarian, and many of my recipes can be easily adapted to meet these and other dietary needs.
My training in social anthropology and time spent traveling and living in other parts of the world has imparted a deep understanding that there is not 'one way' to be or parent or live. I love supporting people to find their way of parenting and being in the world. I offer care that meets people where they are at, and helps them get to where they are wanting to go, taking into account what feels right and true moment to moment, and attuning to how that may shift and change.
The postpartum time is always fantasy and reality crashing together…
My support has been described as feeling like a warm hug. The energy of a very dear friend who you feel wholly comfortable with coming and offering support, if that dear friend also came with zero judgements, decades of newborn experience, and a deep love for feeding and caring for newly postpartum people. I've been praised for my ability to sit in the messy, hard, leaky (whether it's tears, blood, milk, or sweat - often it's all four) puddle time that is postpartum and not be fazed. I consider it a deep honor that families allow me into what are often some of the most disorienting, messy, and hardest moments in their lives. I deeply believe that parenthood isn’t hard because you’re doing it wrong, but due to the depth of transformation and growth that it requires on every level. I do know that it is harder than it needs to be because we have forgotten how much care and support new parents and families need during this time of transition and expansion.
I am perhaps a rude house guest but and excellent doula. I know my way around a kitchen and can find what I need without being hosted or guided.
I can set the mood in even the most cluttered bathrooms, believing that candles, a snack, music, and a delicious beverage can make the time spent in a sitz bath feel like a sacred healing ritual.
Oakland Postpartum Doula
Trained to support the full spectrum of reproductive experiences and outcomes with a focus on nourishing postpartum people and families, opportunities to work with me include Prenatal Postpartum Planning (One-to-one Virtual or In Person); Daytime postpartum doula support; Virtual postpartum support; In-person and virtual new parent circles (beginning soon).
